Fearain shared this on facebook, and I copied it without permission:
* cracks knuckles *
I send thee off with strength and love
Strength of the sun shines upon her firm brow
Brilliance of the moon reveals her strong shoulders
Life of the fire shines bright within her soul
Quickness of lightening lives within her purpose
Hidden depths of the sea swift through her mind
Firmness of earth deep within her body
Stability of rock etched on her visage
About the above poem, the inspiration is taken from an excerpt of an early period celtic poem called the ‘deers cry’ seen below:
I arise today
Through the strength of heaven:
Light of sun,
Radiance of moon,
Slendour of fire,
Speed of lightning,
Swiftness of wind,
Depth of sea,
Stability of earth,
Firmness of rock.”
I am playing with a pre literate composition technique called “ring” composition. This composition technique has been found all over the world from the bible, to Chinese poetry, Homer etc..
Most Ring poems, also known as Chiastic poems, have two main concepts that are related but inverse to each other. You can see this well in Kennedy’s speech ““Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country,” Both concepts are talking about his country but are inverse to each other.
In Ring composition you build up to a crescendo, or important concept, and then retrace your steps back to the beginning of the piece. The most significant piece of the poem is the central line that does not have a mirror.
In the poem I made you can see this easily as it goes
You see where brow and visage connect, shoulders and body, soul and mind, with a crescendo of purpose. This connects in a ring as Brow and visage connect together as concepts.
I also added reference to each previous line connecting them further, I have seen this done similarly if not exactly in a Ring poem and thus am emulating that without fully understanding why.
Lines1. “upon” to “etched” in the last line2. “Strength” from previous line to “Strong”3. “Brilliance” from previous line to “shines”4. “life” from previous line to “lives”5. “lightening” from previous line to “swift”6. “Depths” from previous line to “within” 7. “etched” to “upon” in the first line.
This concept is applied not only to a stanza of poetry but also in story structure, this example is taken from another researcher, beowulf gives several examples of this. The story itself, each battle, and within the text. Here is an example from his battle with Grendel.
B: Grendel’s wish to flee (“fingers cracked”)
C: Uproar in hall; Danes stricken with terror
HEOROT IN DANGER OF FALLINGC’:
Uproar in hall; Danes stricken with terror
B’: “Joints burst”; Grendel forced to flee
Grendel slinking back toward fensBeowulf rejoicingBeowulf left with
You can easily draw similar lines to how the Ring poem I created was set up
See also this PDF: http://nesbl.files.wordpress.com/2010/12/bellamy-sbl.pdf